Relationships: Once alone with a man in a room, he wants to sleep with you at all cost

Dear Bunmi,

I think that too much emphasis is placed on sex these days and I'm a bit cynical about relationships. This worries me a lot. I am a 28-year-old girl and have lost count of the number of men I have slept with. . Culled from bbc hausa and Nigeria Forum

Most of these men I would ordinarily not sleep with, but you discover that once you are left alone with a man in a room, he wants to sleep with you at all cost.

And the lies these men tell! Majority of them make me believe I was the type of girl they'd always been looking for as a wife. As soon as I get pregnant, they won't want to know. I had a few abortions as a result as I don't believe in a single parent family.

Now I'm completely off sex and it worries me. I think I am a bit cynical about relationships and it worries me also to be this way. Diana, by e-mail.

Dear Diana, I think you are a bit depressed as a result of all the disappointments you've had in the past, hence the cynicism and indifference towards sex. It takes two to have a meaningful relationship and it shouldn't make you feel guilty you'd been let down in the past.

I advise you to take things easy and be less eager to trust every man professing to be in love with you. At your age, you should be mature enough to know what you want from a relationship and to discourage opportunists.

In the meantime, concentrate on simply enjoying life with friends and relations until a serious man shows up. When he does, take time to know him better before committing to him.